2020 Vision | Dementia Vs Masterchef

Let’s get one thing straight, I HATE THE KITCHEN.

I don’t belong there.

I belong on stage in front of an audience, this is my domain.

This is where I belong.

I am now in exile and have been for the last 18 months.

I chose this new context for my life.

My Mother’s Dementia means I can no longer live the life I created.

Being a professional Magician has come to a full stop.

Permanent?

I don’t know.

The Pandemic means Social Distancing will have big impact on people once this is all over.

This is my opinion, subjective as it may be, I don’t and will not perform magic for an audience that has any concerns over Social Distancing once the Pandemic is over.

I believe there will be residual impact for professional magicians once the Lockdown is over.

So my life is all about my Mother now.

18 months ago, I had zero brain pattern for being a Carer. I think my brain pattern for this role is now at 0.5%

Trust me, this good because I understand the full impact of looking after an elderly person suffering with this debilitating condition, this is no joke.

I can’t really think of anything else let alone the life I once lived.

To be honest, I am not even sure if the life I said good by to is where I need to good back to once this is all over.

I just feel different about it all.

What has all this got to do with Eggs and Guacamole?

Mum was hungry so, I checked out Youtube, watched a video of Jamie and Ramsey. I thought let me try this classic Dish.

I thought, I can make this, no different than learning a card trick, just follow the instructions.

So, Mum has enjoyed a really yummy lunch.

What’s the message here?

This is something I learnt from Anthony Robbins; “the quality of my life will be in proportion to how much uncertainty I can comfortably live with”.

Everyday is uncertain……that’s Dementia for you.

I have zero attachment to my identity.

Anthony Robbins taught us at his seminar to EXPAND OUR IDENTITY.

As a Gradute of Landmark Education, the greatest lesson I learnt was a simple distinction; in life, things will happen for sure. Who do I need become to deal with this issue?

So today’s Journal entry is all about Acceptance, Commitment, Expanding our Identities and remembering that real pure love is a demonstration beyond the norm.

What we resist will persist.

Thanks for reading 🙏🏾❤️🙏🏾