2020 Vision | Preserving Dignity

This mum on a good day.

Smiling, happy and relatively coherent.

In the shadows, the silent assassin waits.

Lurking patiently and it will strike.

It took me 18 months to find peace with this new context for my life.

Magician, Speaker, Coach, Photographer and now Carer.

This new role caught me completely off guard and I have been unstable ever since.

I am not trained for this.

Guess what?

No one is.

We choose this role out of a sense of love and duty.

On the job training.

Everyday, something will trip me up - I go to bed a complete and utter inadequate failure.

Groundhog Day.

Shopping, Cooking, Cleaning, prepare Breakfast, Lunch and if I have any energy left organise an evening meal.

The Kitchen is not my stage - I have learnt to function effectively in this domain.

I have had to learn how to ask for help.

Professional Carers come in everyday - my home is no longer mine with a stampede of personalities - supporting me and my Mother.

Dementia sufferes need a lot of help.

I can only do so much.

My life is on hold.

My Camera keeps my sanity at bay.

I discovered mum likes Watermelon 🍉

So, I give it to her, she smiles, I find a moments respite of peace. I also know, just around the corner is the silent assassin waiting to trip me up

Preserving Dignity has becoming a daily battle for my mother and also for me.

My best friends has become Acceptance and Equanimity.

Thank you for reading x

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