FV | A Celebration of Life Part ll

I did not anticipate today being such an extraordinary experience, it was. My Mother’s Funeral turned out to be beautiful celebration of her life.

I couldn’t help but document everything that occurred from the moment I left the house.

I am a Photojournalist and this is what I do. I document life, in all of its manifestations. My Mother’s life I feel is well worth documenting and a worthy usage of the loving spirit I feel for her.

It began with the arrival of Mum’s Funeral Cortege.

Two beautiful Jaguars; one for mum’s Coffin and the other car for me and Claudette to ride in.

I saw a gentleman get out of his Car and walked in front of The Hearse.

This, I was told is a mark of respect for the deceased.

Mum’s Coffin looked beautiful, regal and dignified.

The Flowers, a beautiful and colourful arrangement. It looked so exquisite, I was moved by the expression of it, knowing my mother was sleeping peacefully inside.

My Car followed The Hearse all the way to the Church. I saw a number of people on the road stop and watched as we drove past. A few ladies made the sign of the cross and prayed. I found this moving because they didn’t know Mother and yet, felt a connection to a life no longer here.

Our Lady of Lourdes & St Vincent De Paul is Mum’s Church. This was her place of worship every Sunday. This is where I was Baptised, made my First Holy Communion & Confirmation as s young boy. It was fitting that this would be the setting for mum’s final farewell.

Once we arrived at the Church, there was plenty of people inside. I made the effort to greet everyone. Most of the people there where my friends who knew my Mother. My Mother’s friends where there; her Sunday Church Crew as I called them.

One of the highlights was being The Pallbearer. Johnny, the Gentleman who led The Funeral Cortege gave me perfect instructions on how to manoeuvre my body to support mum’s Coffin on my left shoulder. My Cousin John was also Pallbearer.

The Service was led by Father Michael. Claudette and I both presented our tributes. The Order of Service was created by myself and Claudette and beautifully arranged into a keep sake Booklet by Anne-Marie.

By 12 noon, we were on our way to Hanwell Cemetery. This was a s-l-o-w drive through West London.

It was a long and winding drive through the cemetery. Mum’s plot was a fresh new Grave right at the far end. The Plot was nicely isolated right near the edge of the road side.

Father Michael was already in position to deliver the final sermon. Johnny asked me if I would like to lower mum’s Coffin into the grave, I declined. I felt let the professionals handle it.

As Father Michael delivered his final prayers, Johnny moved into position on my right holding a bowl filled with Earth.

I grabbed a handful of Earth and sprinkled it into mum’s grave - this symbolic gesture began the final act.

I watched in complete fascination as the grave diggers filled in the hole. Gone are the days of shovelling. It’s quicker and faster to to use machinery. Within 10 minutes, it was complete.

My Mother’s final place of rest🙏🏽🦋🙏🏽

The last piece of this experience was simply magical - The Laying of the Flowers.

The final presentation of mum’s grave was simply beautiful. I was quite taken by the aesthetics of it all.

I was left with the feeling of life; this complete cycle of life. There is no such thing as death, there is a transitioning of energy. A transformation of shape and form. I know where mum’s body is resting now. Her life energy is in me and you.

This is a wonderful thing to behold.

Yes, there was sadness present. It was moving and emotionally charged. Through it all, my solace was rooted in peace, joy and love. I experienced no issue documenting this. I was not gripped in the morass of crippling grief - that wasn’t my experience. I am in grief but not what I thought it would be.

My grief was the experience of seeing my mother slowly die before my eyes over a two year period. I felt powerless, inadequate and hopeless. I found the courage to do what needed to be done everyday during this period. By the grace of god, I endured this experience of being mum’s Carer.

Mum’s Funeral was a release for me as much as it was for her.

We are both free now🙏🏽🦋🙏🏽

The Epilogue was the light hearted reception with family and friends.

And Finally…

My last image of the day was of Johnny and his collegue.

Before he left, Johnny told me he was once a professional photographer, in the film era of 35mm. He fell into the Funeral Director role shortly after. I greatly admired his showmanship today.

One more thing…..

The day was a success.

I want to acknowledge Claudette for supporting me every step of the way. Fiona of The Chelsea Funeral Home did a wonderful job in caring for mum and supporting me through this process. My family who flew in from Washington D.C., New York and St.Lucia all made a big difference to me and their Aunty May.

Mary M Louis | Sept 5th 1940 - Dec 6th 2022

Thanks for reading

“What we have done for ourselves alone dies with us; what we have done for others and the world remains and is immortal”.

Albert Pike