Enduring

I sit quietly and just allow myself to be still in her presence.

She sleeps.

Drifting in and out of this strange reality called……Life.

Stillness is a beautiful space to be.

It allows me the opportunity to accept and be greatfull for everything.

While sadness is present, I am examining this feeling.

What exactly is sadness?

What does it mean?

Why does it feel so empty and meaningless?

I remembered when Alan died; I didn’t feel sad.

I felt EMPTY.

A massive context from my life died with him. Seeing him take his last breath was a strange privilege. I knew him from the age of 14 so it left me feeling hollow.

I still feel hollow.

I guess with my mother, I will feel even more empty.

Such is life.

There is no happy ending.

I am encouraged by Viktor Frankle from his book “A Man’s Search for Meaning”.

The only victory over suffering is that we endured.

“A thought transfixed me: for the first time in my life, I saw the truth as it is set into song by so many poets, proclaimed as the final wisdom by so many thinkers. The truth - that love is the ultimate and the highest goal to which man can aspire”.

Viktor E. Frankl

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